MyDirtyLittleDarkSecrets And My JuicyLavishAndFlourishingLife

Sunday, August 27

I love you without a doubt;

And so much that i can`t count.

I think about you all the time;

You`re the only one that runs through my mind.

And without you;

I`m dying inside.

These feelings i can no longer hide.

So i sit patiently and wait for the day,

That you`ll feel the same;

No matter how long it takes.

7:22 PM
gimme kisses

Saturday, August 26

Been goin through lots of downs n tears. Many things happened so suddenly for e past week. Many stuffs have been ponderin through on my mind. Cried for e past three days. It`s been a long long long time i really cried with immense sadness. Not unless i cried whn i feel happy. hahaha.

Forced myself to put up a smile on my face once i stepped out of my house every mornin. On the verge of breakin down. And because of my emotions, i quarrelled w my sis many many times once i reached home. Little little conflicts and arguments turned my house upside down. And for now, i chose not to tok to anyone and let myself cool down first. I noe it`s not gonna work whn i pretended nothin happened. Not gonna work if i kept ponderin and ponderin and actions not taken. I must do sumting abt it to improve the situation! =))

Well. human really faces with lots of challenges. Friends ard miee aren`t feelin great neither. Relationship problems,schools,family problems,work n etc. Tried all means n my very very best to console em through fone, messages, encouragin words n etc. People, cheer up please. Keep smilin. Don`t frown! Wil always be there for u guys.

Ya, it`s not gonna be easy. I understand how u guys feel. serious. And one ting i hate abt myself is, i lovess comforting peeps ard miee yet i failed to do tt to myself. =((

11:13 PM
gimme kisses

Sunday, August 20

The worst mth ever. =(( 10 more days to go. Sept`s reachin. I juz hope tat next mth would be a better mth for miee. Many gatherin and etc would b held nx mth as well. So excited. =)) missya guys lots.

Happiee Birthday Ferlyn! :D (19 Aug)
missya lots. Jiayou in NP and work hard for all your exams. You`ll do well girl. :)) Haf a blessed bdae. Keep smilin and keep shinin.

loveya lots sweeetssss. :D

Saw eileen on coincidence three days ago. missya lots too. Haven`t been see-in her everysince we met up for sum BBQ-in gatherin tt day. Was in a rush though so din catch up w her much. =(

Was browsin through sum fotos, letters, diary, gifts and etc tt was taken/written/given by frendx since young til now. yupx, i stil keep all these stuffs! Like durin PAP to pri.sch days to sec.sch days to now. goodness. And i realised i`ve really lost in touch w sum of my frendx. Saw sum familiar faces as well bt i really forgot sum of thier names. =(

Was really bored these few days at nite. Msn-in frendx and chatted madly. Consoling frendx who isn`t in a good mood as well. Shared many stuffs and we even go back to e past. Talked abt those times how we bcame frendx and we digged out many peeps names as well. LOLS. Especially those 'famous' frendx in school who oways get punished and vice versa. So much misses. Haha. :D

Left: Mingjie Right: Zihui (how they looked like durin pri.sch days!)

They oways stick together. played a fool and etc. But thier results are fantastically good. Lost in touch with both of em. misses em lots. =( Stil rmbed they oways hang out after school at my previous house 'playground' every single day. Even after remedial or extra lessons after school as well. And without fails, zihui`ll call miee at least ONCE every single day and we chatted on e fone for hours. Even if he reached home early, i would expect to receive a call frm him between 2-3pm, in e evenin n once every night. And if he goes back to his hometown, i would expect to receive a call frm him as well. LOLS. No hp durin those days so my house fone every mth would rise up to about 100 plus to 200. ya. I was scolded by my parents at tt time too. (missed)

See?! :D. tat`s kaifong. haha. durin pri.sch days, i stil rmbed he`s a well-known and well-famous guy in school as well as in class. hahaha. lots of girls goin after him. He`s a well-liked guy as well. Stil rmbed we attended e same private tuition classes and he`s one of e smart guys who never studied yet achieved good results durin exams. playful n naughty at e same time. Met up w him abt three years ago durin our gatherin. he`ve grown into a much more mature guy. ya. See our class 'board'? Durin those times i stil rmbed my class was so pathetic and they used chalk to write on e board. hahaha. See those 'vandalism' on the board?! Tat`s us. so childish. hahaha. :D

Missed ya guys lots. Where haf u guys gone to? =((

2:57 PM
gimme kisses

Wednesday, August 16

I`ve read tis sumwhere sumhow. And i found it rather meaninful. :D

When the door of happiness closes, another opens;

But often times we look so long at the closed door that we don`t see the one which has been opened for us.

Don`t go for looks; they can deceive. Don`t go for wealth; even that fades away.

Go FOR SOMEONE WHO MAKES YOU SMILE, because it takes only A SMILE TO MAKE A DARK DAY SEEMS BRIGHT.

Find the one that makes your heart smiles.

Dream what you want to dream. Go where you want to go. Be what you what to be.

Because you have only one life and one chance to do all the things you want to do.

The happiest of people don`t necessarily have the best of everything;

They just make the most of everything that comes along thier way.

The brightest future will always be based on a forgotten past;

You can`t go forward in life until you let go of your failures and heartaches.

When you were born, you were crying and everyone around you were smiling.

Live your life to the fullest so at the end, you`re the one who`s smiling and everyone around you is crying.

Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take;

But measured by the moments that take our breath away!

10:47 PM
gimme kisses

Tuesday, August 15

I`m goin blind soon! If anione happens to see miee on e streets carryin a walkin stick and with eyes folded with a piece of cloth or sumting, dun mock at miee please. Or alternatively, wearin spec and look like a nerd or auntie or sumting else. uhh ya. Never tease miee please.

:((((

Well. aniwae, tml`ll be a busy day for miee. Yet i like it so much. hee. :)) Time gonna passes quickly as expected and very fast, i`ll call it a day! Wanna head to cinema or wateva to watch 'SeeNoEvil' or 'GhostGame.' Rather excitin i suppose? saw e ads for e 'SeeNoEvil' and it seems like 101% gross, sudden and scary. oh goshhh. :D

I`m so tempted to watch. awww. Anyone wanna join miee? (;

11:55 PM
gimme kisses

Monday, August 14

I`m super happy today! (; All thanks to Jas and Fang. so much lovess. muacks. And joey`s back! She went MIA for days. wahahas. nooo. She juz went for a holiday. And i juz missya like crazy. awwww. lovesss :D

9:31 PM
gimme kisses

Saturday, August 12

It`s just another day! :D

And it`s my offday today as well.

I lovesss surprisesss. Wat`s best in life is to receive lots and lots of surprises. 'Surprises' makes a person super happy yet super touched at e same time. Get to celebrate AP n Cori birthday on Tuesday. Awww. Lots of foods on tt day. goodness. They bought my favourite cake as well. And I guess e whole day at work were spent on birthday celebration, chit-chattin, madness and laughters. LOLS. How nice whn my boss went for a business trip for a week.

09/08

Happieee Birthday Singapore!

I`m contented tt i`m livin in a safe country. No bombs; no natural disasters. haha.

Never get to join sum peeps for kbox gatherin on Wed. Had decided to go sumwhere else instead with other peeps. And they oni decided to go kbox on tt particular day. LOLS. Did i mention i cancelled another kbox outin with grace n peeps one week ago as well? Super sorry guys. Change another day please. :D

Whneva i`m packed, i`m really super packed. As in whn one`s busy, they makes a person can`t even breathe. Whneva i`m bored, I`m really super bored. As in suddenly no one ask miee out. Neither i haf aniting on on tt day. Tat`s whn i feels so so lonely. haha. :))))

Half a day had passed. Wat haf I done whn i woke up since 9am in e mornin? LOLS. Felt so gulity to sae it out. :((( Tat`s abt it. Gonna work on sum meaninful stuffs nw. LOLS.

2:37 PM
gimme kisses

Saturday, August 5

Let miee blog an entry bfore goin over to my grandparents hse. =))

All along, i wished to b a happy person. It`s nt tat I`m nt happy w my current life right now. Sumhow or rather, i feel so melancholic at times. I noe my family`ll b there for me without fails whn i`m down, whn i`m hurt, whn i`m sick and whn if I HAF NO FRIENDS. But right now, I`m contented tt i haf a happy family and i`ve many frendx who cared and loved me and who really treasured me in such a way tt we`re like a happy family. =)))

Haf ya guys experienced before; sumtymes whn we treated sumone alittle closer den e other person, e person who saw tt`ll nt feel happy. Jealousy is wat i meant. For example, whn two different groups of frendx who asked ya to mit up on e same day and we could only choose one group. Which group of frendx who ya choose den? Both groups`re ya close frendx, both groups`re e ones whom u haf nt met up w em for ages, both groups out of so many frendx ya haf known`ll b there for you whn u`re down. Tat`s whn u haf a headache. In a no way out situation, you could oni choose one group and apologised to another group. Or to be fair; u choose not to meet up w both parties. But is tat a good solution? Like e same goes to; both guys woo you at e same time, and both of ya`re your cup of tea. If u choose one, you would hurt e other one. If u choose two, u`re such a disgrace to yourself. If u choose none, you`ll nt forgive yaself? Or perhaps I dun tink wat u guys tink at e same time too.

Sumtymes in life, we should really choose wat`s best for our ownself. =)) So wat if i could get into poly and study? however, they gave miee courses which i`m really nt interested in. I tried not to care abt wat others sae. I choose nt to get an un-interested dip course cert. yupx, i noe. Whn frendx do tel miee, doesn`t mean tt you go poly study and get into e course u dun like bt u got a dip cert, you stil haf to pursue your career w tt cert. But but... i seriously duno how to explain to those frendx how i feel. Though i cum out w all sorts of reasons to xplain to em. yet, i get back these three words. 'you`re silly!' Sumtymes i really agress wat they sae. In sum situations, i dun wanna care hw others feel for miee. I choose wat`s best for miee. I nv deny tt i haf planned hw my future gonna b like. Bein a boss oso met up w lots of obstacles. They fall and fall, many many many times till they succeed. So i believed no matter how silly i`m, how foolish and how stupid m i, i`ll succeed juz like one of em too. Time`s e source tt i probably need. But i`m 18 nw, gettin old soon. sighh. Perhaps my route would b longer den any success pple out there. haha One day, i saw tis. 'Pple who wants to succeed oso takes time to be a successful person' Am i tryin to console myself? LOLS. wateva it`s, let nature takes it course. haha.

:D:D

3:39 PM
gimme kisses

Friday, August 4

Sumtymes i wondered, i wondered how to make our life interestin? In other words, funs and happiness and yet meaninful at e same time? Other den e usual activities like schoolin for students, workin for adults, hangin out w frendx or family, nights movies and leisure actitivies, relationship and etc, is there any other special stuffs to live life even more to the fullest? haha. Life is just like tat. Whn we`re already more den fortunate den any poor people out there, we stil crave for more. Humans are really greedy and selfish. Dun ya tink so? Take tis as an example; have you seen a person who betted and won lots of money and yet they bet even more e next time round tinkin tt they would win thrice as much?

And i so-hate-myself so much today. Am i too over-sensitive or am i avoidin? I`m so disappointed. I saw a frendx on coincidence whom i haf nt met for sumtime. And i was chattin w kris happily and whn i looked up; i saw tt frendx. Halfway through my conversations w kris, i told Kris tt i should be get goin and i ran as fast as my legs could carry miee to another side of e main road. sigh. i haf no idea why. seriously haf no idea. And i was so worried tt tis frendx saw miee and called my name out loud. LOLS.

Haf you guys missed a person sooo dearly before til u fall asleep automatically at nite? The more u missed the person, e more u feel weary and you fall asleep? The next mornin, you would haf a heavy headache? Whenever ya feels moody, u would tink of tt person. Whn u did sumting great and feel so proud of yaself, u would like to share w tt person as well? To conclude, you juz hope tt the person is forever yours? =))) But wasn`t wya all the while. Supportin you, givin ya all e cares and concern, lovess and most imptly; the charmin smile? heehee.

And work`s exhausted yet challengin at e same time. Promotions, marketin, accounts, purchasin, inventory and merchanisin. goodness. Up to 70% warehse sales is on currently. Givin out e advertisments through letter box and ads printed on e newspaper today and tml respectively. Too excited for words. LOLS

Family gatherin tml`s nite. =)) And at e same time, it`s my grandfather bdae tml. Though he`s over seventy, yet i stil dun see he looks like one. HAPPIEEE BIRTHDAY AHGONG~ You`re e best grandfather in the apple of my eyes. my darling cousins. awww. so much lovess n misses. muacks. :D

9:53 PM
gimme kisses